Student Voices - Stepping into Training - Gordon

Written by Gordon Smith

If you don’t know what to expect in life then, I guess, anything you get will be a surprise. It follows that each surprise will be either a pleasant one, or a not so pleasant one.

And so it was with my attendance at the first ever training weekend with Rites and Rituals Scotland. Or at least, that’s what I was contemplating on the Friday night before finally nodding off.

Let me be clear though, any uncertainty was in my head and nothing to do with any lack of clarity from Lindy and Victoria. In fact, the process from promoting the opportunity to train with Rites and Rituals, through the perfectly crafted questions in the application form, the subsequent interview, and the course joining instructions, left me in little doubt as to what was on offer. But I still didn’t know what to expect. Of myself!

You see, I’m quite a conservative sort of chap. I have a religious faith, and have had for many a year, but even that part of my heart rarely ventures on to my sleeve. How would I be in a room of people whom I’ve never met, if they “get it”, and I don’t.

Despite being conservative, I like a good laugh. (in fact, I can’t do serious for a whole hour, never mind a full day) What if they are so focused, and deep, and the only prayer I can muster is “beam me up Scotty”? What if my curiosity about spirituality, and my level in it, couldn’t be satisfied.

I needn’t have worried. From the moment I arrived at the venue, sitting in the valley of Loch Tay, I could feel my blood pressure drop, and on entering our training space, that feeling continued. Yes, there was the usual pre-start nerves around what everyone would be like and what they would think of me, but these too subsided. Quickly.

This weekend, the first of four, explored The Art of Ceremony & Ritual, and the setting, content, delivery, and the rituals we shared (no spoiler alerts here!) put my mind, and body totally at ease.

So, yes, I was surprised. Pleasantly surprised. Surprised at how quickly I got, not it, but me. There’s a way to go yet, but already I am comfortable with where I sit on the spectrum that is spirituality, and how my understanding of that will help me serve those looking for ceremony from someone like me. The genuine me, and not me trying to be someone, or something, else.

I’ll finish with what I wrote in my journal at the end of the first morning. Being in my journal, the words were intended only for me to read but, honestly, they say it all.

“I feel safe, comfortable with those I am with, and content in the space we are sharing.

Already any fears I have about being ‘different’ have gone. In fact, I look forward to being different; to being myself – to continue being myself.

I’m ready!