Student Voices - Practice Makes Perfect

Written by Marion Gillooly

With most things in life, practice makes perfect, and becoming a Rites and Rituals Scotland Ceremonialist is no different. The ancient Scottish marriage rituals are sometimes complex, always deeply spiritual, and usually fun. But legal wedding ceremonies must also contain some specific content to ensure the marriage is lawful. So, it’s essential for us to practise, practise, practise to enable us to lead our couples through their ceremonies with confidence and composure.

Just as the practical aspects of leading a legal marriage ceremony need to be perfect, so does our attention to the relationship we as celebrants develop with our couples – getting to know them, listening to their wishes, and responding to challenges on the day to give them the wedding of their dreams. Because there will always be challenges – a couple that forgets to bring the marriage schedule to the venue, a best man who forgets the rings, a tiny flower girl who gets stage fright, or a pampered, adored pooch that can’t resist the urge to poop at the altar (nightmare!). Thankfully, most of the challenges are more likely to be hiccups than nightmares, but we need to handle all of them with authenticity and grace.

One of the things I’ve loved most about the Rites and Rituals training weekends is the time we’ve spent building connections with each other. The focus on connections is vital because we are a community of support for each other, we’re exploring our understanding of our own spirituality, and we are laying the foundations of the Rites and Rituals ways of working. Most importantly, in practising how to make connections, we are honing our craft. We are developing our capacity to form connections with our couples, and with their wedding guests, giving them a personal, spiritual, unforgettably enjoyable experience on their special day.

There’s that word ‘spiritual’ again. It is central to all that we do, and our weekend was incredibly spiritual and moving, but not as intense or serious as you might think. We pondered on the seasons of the year, and seasons of our lives, and talked about our capacity to hold elements of all the seasons within us at the same time. For example, if we think about age, we might be in the autumn of life, but our sense of fun has been carried forward from childhood, the springtime of life; our passion for making a difference may have its roots in our life’s summertime. You get the idea.  

One of the challenges of starting something new is thinking about how to describe it to people. Rites and Rituals Scotland is a community of Scottish celebrants. It’s a spiritual community that celebrates life’s transitions with heart, honesty and humour. Creating something this special means going back to basics and examining our personal attributes and values, and practising being true to who we are, regardless of how the outside world perceives us. It’s an absolute privilege to be given this opportunity.